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If the continued use of alcohol/drugs has a destructive effect on an individual's family or interpersonal relationships, job performance, health or financial condition, there is good reason to suspect dependency. Any of these areas affected by alcohol/drug use is good enough reason for concern.

When dependency is suspected, every effort must be made to refer the individual to a qualified addiction counselor, where a complete and in-depth diagnostic evaluation can be conducted and critical clinical treatment services prescribed if deemed clinically necessary.

This is easier said than done, give the denial system mentioned previously. It is our suggestion that non-alcoholic concerned parties secure some reading material; see a counselor for advice; join Al-Anon, which is an educational, self-help organization for concerned relatives and friends of alcoholics; and learn as much about the illness as possible.

Intervention into alcoholism is a painful process for everyone involved and must be done with clear understanding that it is necessary, even crucial, if the individual is to survive and that half-measures will simply not suffice.

A crisis is often necessary in order to force the individual to accept the seriousness of his/her situation and accept help. Usually the individual will create his/her own crisis, and it only remains for the concerned person to let the alcoholic be responsible for his/her own behavior and therefore have a greater chance of recognizing the consequences of his/her continued use.

All too often, the alcoholic has been supported in his/her addiction by those well-meaning people around him/her. In fact, the well-meaning people actually help to continue the addictive pattern because they feel duty bound (or guilt ridden) to constantly pick up the pieces for the person using alcohol/drugs. Because they enable the addiction by preventing the alcoholic from facing the consequences of his/her behavior, they are called "enablers".

The enabler operates from many points of view. Often the alcoholic has succeeded in convincing the people around him/her that they are responsible for his/her alcoholism. "With a wife like you, who wouldn't drink" or "With my job pressures, anyone would drink/use drugs like I do". These are complete fabrications; no one is guilty of causing alcoholism since we don't know the single cause of it. These alibis only serve to pacify the conscience of the alcoholic and, at the same time, spread guilt among the people who support them. This guilt then strengthens the alcoholic's hold on his/her supporters.

Other "enablers" tend to operate from the premise that they control the drinking and in some way manage both the alcoholic and his/her problem. This doesn't work...alcoholics can stop drinking, but they cannot control their drinking. Total abstinence is the safest remedy we have at this stage of our knowledge.

Another type of enabler believes that alcoholism is only a symptom of some other underlying problem, and that if this causative factor can be dealt with, the alcoholism will disappear. This is simply not true and its fallacy has been demonstrated over and over again.

Alcoholism and Drug Addiction, is a "primary" illness and must be treated as such. The alcoholic or drug addict who uses chemicals will continue to do so destructively whether he/she has any problems or not. The point is that other problems cannot be successfully dealt with except in the absence of the chemical; and when sobriety is maintained, many of the problems disappear.

Unfortunately, this type of enabler is often times a professional such as a doctor, clergyman, social worker or marriage counselor. Fortunately, for the dependent people, these professionals are slowly coming to realize the error of their well-meaning endeavors and are gradually accepting dependency as a legitimate illness with a prescribed course of treatment.

An alcoholic or drug addict cannot die of their illness without the support of at least one other person described above. Although there is not guilt attached to dependency itself, it would seem that there is certainly a moral obligation on the part of the concerned persons to see that the afflicted person gets the help he/she so desperately needs.

In summary, intervention is a process of becoming detached from the problems created by the illness, not from the person, and letting the alcoholic take full responsibility for his/her behavior.
Stop lying for them, making excuses and protecting them from embarrassment. Be honest with them no matter how painful and tell it like it is, being neither judgmental nor critical of them as a person. It is not a moral illness though they have secretly begun to think it is, and you will only strengthen this assumption and make matters worse. Openly and honestly confront the person with the facts neither mitigating nor exaggerating anything. Point out the obvious conclusion and explain what help is available. Then tell the person what you are going to do and not what they are going to do. Lay out some alternatives that you are considering and give those options. Do not threaten any actions which you are not fully intending to carry out. Remember that Compassion is the key to successful intervention.

The focus of your efforts is always to get this person to a trained professional counselor or to Alcoholics Anonymous. If you have a good relationship with a knowledgeable and understanding clergyman, doctor, or social worker, fill them in on your objectives and possibly they will serve as the instrument by which the alcoholic or drug addict can be induced to see a qualified counselor.